> Santa asks: Who r u? > Wife: How dare u forget ur wife? > Santa: Nasha har gam ko bhula deta hai > **************************************************************************** > Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Y r u > removing a > wheel from ur auto? > Santa: Can't u read 'Parking for two wheelers only' > **************************************************************************** > Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis ke liye? > Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi > to > tumhare liye. > **************************************************************************** > Santa: Doc saab, mein Chashma laga ke pad to sakoonga? > Doc: Haan, bilkul. > Santa: To phir theek hai doc saab varna Anpad aadmi ki zindagi bhi > koi > zindagi hai. > **************************************************************! ************** > Santa: Raat film main ek chudail kabhi mere aage, khabhi mere peechhe > ghoom > rahi thi... > Jeeto: Koun si film thi ? > Santa: Apni shaadi ki movie thi ! > **************************************************************************** > Santa joined NASA. After one month the Americans had to change the > name > from > NASA to SATYANASA > ****************************! ************************************************ > Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai. > Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho? > Santa: I'm falling in love. > **************************************************************************** > Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho? > Santa: Suicide karne ke liye > Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai? > Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye > **************************************************************************** > Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets > Jeeto: Why 3? > Santa: For you and your parents > **************************************************************************** > Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken. > Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one. > **************************************************************************** > Lady Doc: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyon > ghoorte > ho? > Santa: Ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai: Auraton ko dekhne ka samay > 9am-11am > **************************************************************************** > A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein > Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya. > **************************************************************************** > At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my > hand, > oh! > Santa: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his > head. Is > he crying? > **************************************************************************** > In an interview, > Interviewer: How does an electric motor run? > Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr.....! > Inteviewer shouts: Stop it. > Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup... > **************************************************************************** > Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got > irritated... > drank poison & said, > Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge! > **************************************************************************** > Captain of Military: Naujawanon aage bado Santa aage nahin bada > Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade? > Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha > **************************************************************************** > Banta: Yaar teri wife ki maut ka bara afsos hua, vaise hua kya tha? > Sant: Goli lagi thi mathe main. > Banta: Waheguru ji ka shukar kar ke aankh bach gayi. > ************************************************! **************************** > Santa apni khoobsurat Bibi k saath car mein baitha. Driver ne sheesha > set > kiya. Santa gusse mein bola, meri bibi ko dekhkta hai, piche baith, > car > mein > chalaoonga! > **************************************************************************** > Santa: tainu Sunny Deol da phone no pata hai...? > Banta: Nahin, kyon ki hoya? > Santa: Yaaar asi Nalka patauna si. > **************************************************************************** > Banta: U cheated me. > Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u. > Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all > India > Radio! > **************************************************************************** > Sadhu: Bachcha teri biwi ko chuddail chipak gayee hai. Upaaye > karvaao. > Banta: Upayaye? Baba, agar do behenein gale mil rahi hain to is mein harz > hi > kya hai ? > **************************************************************************** > Tourist: Whose skeleton is that? > Santa: Tipu's skeleton. > Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it? > Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child > **************************************************************************** > Napoleon: There is no such word as 'Impos! sible' in my dictionary. > Santa: To dictionary dekh kar kharidni thi ...! > **************************************************************************** > Santa: Agar tumhe kuch ho gaya to mein Pagal ho jaaunga. > Jeeto: Doosri shaadi to nahin karogey? > Santa: Pagal ka kya hai, kuch bhi kar sakta hai > **************************************************************************** > Banta: ! Yeh AUTOMATICALLY kya hota hai? > Santa: Oye tujhe yeh bhi nahin pata, Jab auto mein koi ganji ladki ja > rahi > ho to use kehte hain AUTO-ME-TAKLI > **************************************************************************** > Santa was riding on a horse. He jumped the red light & a cop > whistles. > Santa lifts the tail of horse & says: 'Le Karle Number Note' > **************************************************************************** > Banta: Oye, tu to Doctor ke paas jaane waala tha, kya hua? > Santa: Yaar kal jaaonga, aaj thodi tabiyat kharab hai. > **************************************************************************** > Santa: Itne kam marks? Do thappad marne chahiye. > Pappu: Haan papa, chalo maine us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha > hai. > **************************************************************************** > Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call. > Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here. > Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya > **************************************************************************** > Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery. > The shopkeeper asked: Exide laga du? > Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya? > *************

_________________________________________________________________

Smart Woman

                                                                           
                                                                             
                                                                             
>    Just a laugh..........................                                   
>                                                                             
>    >                                                                        
>    >                                                                        
>    >Smart Woman                                                             
>    >WIFE VS. HUSBAND                                                        
>    >A couple drove down a country road for several                          
>    >miles,not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led                  
>    >to an                                                                   
>    >argument and neither of them wanted to concede their                    
>    >position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats,                    
>    >and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives                   
>    >of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "In-laws."                          
>    >                                                                        
>    >WORDS                                                                   
>    >A husband read an article to his wife about how many                    
>    >words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.                      
>    >The wife replied, "! The reason has to be because we                    
>    >have to repeat everything to men...                                     
>    >The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"                  
>    >                                                                        
>    >CREATION                                                                
>    >A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you                   
>    >can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same                       
>    >time.                                                                   
>    >" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made                    
>    >me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;                           
>    >God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!                      
>    >                                                                        
>    >WHO DOES WHAT                                                           
>    >A man and his wife were having an argument about who                    
>    >should brew the coffee each morning.                                    
>    >The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up                    
>    >first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get                    
>    >our coffee."                                                            
>    >The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking                        
>    >around here and you should do it, because that is your                  
>    >job, and I can just wait for my coffee." Wife                           
>    >replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it                         
>    >is in the Bible that th! e man should do the coffee."                   
>    >Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."                       
>    >So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament                  
>    >and showed him at the top of several pages,                             
>    >that it indeed says.......... "HEBREWS"                                 
>    >                                                                        
>    >                                                                        
>    >The Silent Treatment                                                    
>    >A man and his wife were having some problems at home                    
>    >and were giving each other the silent treatment.                        
>    >Suddenly, the man realized that the                                     
>    >next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00                    
>    >AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting                    
>    >to be the first to break the                                            
>    >silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,                       
>    >"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew                   
>    >she would find                                                          
>    >it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to                          
>    >discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.                   
>    >Furious, he was about to go and see why his                             
>    >wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of                     
>    >paper by the bed.! The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM.                      
>    >Wake up."                                                               
>    >                                                                        
>    >                                                                        
>    >                                                                        
>    >Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.                       
>    >                                                                        
>    >                                                                        
>    >God may have created man before woman, but there is                     
>    >always a rough draft before the masterpiece.                            
>    >                                                                        
>    >SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN                    
>    >YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!                                                
>    >                                                                        

---

Express yourself instantly with Windows Live Messenger! Windows Live Messenger!

POEM - Fire and Ice

Fire and Ice

I am fire
You are ice
I am naughty
You are nice

I consume
You cool off
My edges are ragged
You're smooth and soft

My kisses ignite
While yours soothe
You lay supine
I like to move

I consume
And like to devour
And you bear it all
With your glacial power

I lick your edges
And you tame mine
What happens between us
Is simply divine.

My passion blazes
Yours is steady and sure
When we make love
Our bodies blur

And meld together
Creating something new
Another element
Made of me and you

Without your ice
I'd rage out of control
And without my fire
You'd numb your soul

A perfect balance
We've found paradise
I am fire
You are ice

---

Express yourself instantly with MSN Messenger! MSN Messenger

UR BRAIN MAINTENANCE. NICE ONE

 

B eloware four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately . OK? Let's find out just how clever you really are.... Ready? GO!!!(scroll down) First Question: Y ou are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~     Answer:If you answered that you are first, then you are absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second! Try not to screw up next time. Now answer the second question, but don'ttake as much time as you took for th! e first question, OK ? Second Question: If you overtake the last person, then you are...? (scroll down)     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~     Answer:If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person? You're not very good at this, are you?     Third Question: Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it. Take 1000and add 40to it. Now ! add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000 Now add 10. What is the total? Scroll down for answer..... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you get5000? The correct answer is actually 4100. If you don't believe it, check it with a calculator! Today is definitely not your day, is it? Maybe you'll get the last question right.... .....Maybe. Fourth Question: Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Did you AnswerNunu? NO!Of course it isn't. Her name is Mary.Read the question again! Okay, now the bonus round: Amute person goes into a shop and wa! nts to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and! the purchase is done. Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~     He just has to open his mouth and ask... It's really very s! imple.... Like you!     PASS THIS ON TO FRUSTRATE THE SMART PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE!

 

ForwardSourceID:NT000022CA

 

--
Regards,

Nitin 

---

Enter the Windows Live Mail beta sweepstakes Upgrade today

North indian Girl Vs South Indian Girl

North indian Girl Vs South Indian Girl
 
******WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A North Indian GIRL as
WIFE***********
 
1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has
more boyfriends than her age. 
 
2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood
heroine and after marriage you have to go around her
twice to completely hug her.
 
3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to
you, you are bankrupt because of the number of times
you had to take her out to movies,  theatres and
restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry. 
 
4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer
butter masala, aloo sabji, aloo gobi sabji, aloo
matar, aloo paneer, that after eating  all those
paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with
chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder. 
 
5. The only growth that you see later in your career
is the rise in your monthly phone bill.
 
6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she
is a blonde. Only later do you come to know that it is
because of the mehandhi that she  applies to cover her
grey hair. 
 
7. When you come home from office she is very busy
watching "Kyonki saas bhi kabi bahu thi" that you
either end up eating outside or cooking yourself.
 
8. You are a very "ESpecial" person to her. 
 
9. She always thought that Madras is a state and
covers the whole of south india until she met you.
 
10. When she says she is going to "work out" she means
she is going to " walk out"
 
11. She has greater number of relatives than the
number of people you have in your home town.
 
12. The only two sentences in English that she knows
are "Thank you" and "How are you"
 
13. She thinks Govinda can dance better than Michael
Jackson. 
 
 
******WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South Indian GIRL as
WIFE***********
 
1.Her mother looks down at you because you didn't
study in IIT or Madras / Anna University .
 
2. Her father starts or ends every conversation with "
... I say..." 
 
3. She shudders if you use four letter words.
 
4. She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The
Dubai based Oil Well Company will negotiate with her
on a 25 year contract to extract coconut oil from her
hair.) 
 
5. She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.
 
6. Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
 
7. Her first name is longer than your first name,
middle name and surname combined (unless you are from
Andhra) 
 
8. When she mixes milk/curd and rice you are never
sure whether it is for the dog or for herself.
 
9. For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on
her head and wears silk saris in the Madras heat
without looking too uncomfortable while you are
melting in your singlet. 
 
10. She thinks Mohan Lal is the sexiest man alive.
 
11. Her favourite cricketer is Krishnamachari
Srikkanth.
 
12. Her favourite food is dosa though she has tried
North Indian snacks like Chats (pronounced like the
slang for 'conversation') 
 
13. She bursts into songs with her cousins in every
movie.
 
14. She bores you by telling you which raaga each song
you hear is based  on.
 
15. You have to give her jewellery, though she has
already got plenty of  it .. 
 
16. Her thali (Mangal Sutra) weighs more than the
championship belts worn by WWF wrestlers.
 
17. She is more educated than you.
 
18. Her father thinks she is much smarter than you..
-- 
 
 

---

Crush! Zap! Destroy! Junk e-mail trembles before the might of Windows Live(tm) Mail beta. Windows Live(tm) Mail beta

worldwide survey

A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:

"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"

The survey was a huge failure, In Africa they didn't know what 'food' meant, In India they didn't know what 'honest' meant, In Europe they didn't know what 'shortage' meant, In China they didn't know what 'opinion' meant, In the Middle East they didn't know what 'solution' meant, In South America they didn't know what 'please' meant, And in the USA they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant!!!

This is so true in the 21st century

This is so true in the 21st century
Our Communication-Wireless
Our dress-Topless
Our Telephone-Cordless
Our cooking-Fireless
Our youth-Jobless
Our food-Fatless
Our labour-Effortless
Our conduct-Worthless
Our relation-Loveless
Our attitude-Careless
Our feeling-Heartless
Our politics-Shameless
Our education-Valueless
Our follies-Countless
Our arguments-Baseless
Our boss-Brainless
Our Job-Thankless
Our Salary- Very less

---

take heed of this phrase cuz it's just so inspirational

The first day of school, our professor introduced himself and challenged   us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look   around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned around to find a   wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her   entire being.     She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can   I give you a hug?" I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course   you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.     “Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked. She   jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, have a   couple of children, and then retire and travel."     "No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be   taking on this challenge at her age.     "I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting   one!" she told me.     After class we walked to the student union building and shared a   chocolate milkshake. We became instant friends. Every day for the next   three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was   always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her   wisdom and experience with me.     Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily   made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in   the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living   it up.     At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football   banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and   stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech,   she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. Frustrated and a   little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm   sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is   killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell   you what I know."      As we laughed she cleared her throat and began: "We do not stop playing   because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only   four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success.     "You have to laugh and find humor every day."     "You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. We have   so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it!"     "There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. If you   are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one   productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven   years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn   eighty-eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or   ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding the opportunity in   change."     "Have no regrets. The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we   did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death   are those with regrets."     She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose." She   challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily   lives. At the years end Rose finished the college degree she had begun   all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in   her sleep.     Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to   the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be   all you can possibly be.     If you read this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your   friends and family, they'll really enjoy it! We send these words in   loving memory of Rose.     Remember: Growing older is mandatory, growing up is optional

 

 

DREAMS

~DREAMS~

 

 
Your dreams can be your future
Do you think this could be true
My heart speaks in my dreams
And tells me what to do

 

Asleep so peacefully late at night
Feeling safe and warm in my bed
Dreams flying all about
Deep inside my head

 

There is a conversation
Coming from my heart
Putting my dreams together
Right from the very start
 
In the daytime, sun is bright
Through this world I walk about
Many things just happen
Leaving me with doubt

 

What can these feelings be
Within this heart of mine
Whispers, "Don't be afraid
Everything will be just fine"

 

If I believe in my dreams
Because I listened to my heart
Then love has captured me completely
In my life, you are a part

 

I never even hoped to find
A love that could be true
Conversation within my dream
My heart has spoke of you
 
Dreams are put together
Between the heart and the mind
Each beat sends the message
True love, I did find

Words of Wisdom ----

 

Money is not everything...

There's MasterCard & Visa!

 

One should love animals...

They are so tasty!

 

Save water...

Shower with your girl friend!

 

Love thy neighbor...

But don't get caught!

 

Behind every successful man, there is a woman...

And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two!

 

Every man should marry...

After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.

 

Wise men never marry...

And, when they marry they become otherwise.

 

Children in backseats cause accidents...

Accidents in backseats cause children!

 

"Hard work never killed anybody..."

But why take the risk!

 

"Work fascinates me!"

I can look at it for hours!!

 

God made relatives...

Thank God we can choose our friends.

 

The more you learn, the more you know...

The more you know, the more you forget!

The more you forget, the less you know...

So... why learn?!

 

Love is photogenic...

It needs darkness to develop!

LOVE

LOVE

 

Love hurts;

It causes great pain.

 

Love also heals;

But leaves behind a stain.

 

Long live love;

Forever it may last.

 

Love dies

And becomes a thing of the past.

 

Love kills;

Till death do us part.

 

Love breaks

Everyone's heart.

 

Love warps

The reality we know.

 

Love hides

The reality that doesn't show.

 

Love confuses

Leaving us in confusion

 

Love is deceiving

It's one big delusion

 

Love is a dream

Until we wake

 

Love is real

Our hearts ache

 

Love is a mystery

That can't be solved.

 

Love is a problem

That is never resolved.

   

Love makes you think

In strange, but wonderful ways 

 

Love can be temporary

Lasting only for days

 

Love can be permanent

Up to death

 

Love has side-effects

Like shortness of breath

 

Love is weird

It makes no sense

 

Love is nerve-racking

It makes you tense

 

Love is found

In an unusual place

 

Love is lost

And leaves no trace

 

Love is for everyone

And no one at all

 

Love is for the short

And for the tall

 

Love is for the fat

And also the thin

 

Love is a game

You cannot win

  

Love is for the good

And it's for the bad

 

Love is hard on your sanity

It can drive you mad

 

 

Love is for me

Love is for you

And with love

You won't know what's true

Top excuses if found asleep at your Desk...

Top excuses if found asleep at your Desk...

 

"Oh, Man! Come in at 6 in the morning and look what happens!"

 

"This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"

 

"This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!"

 

"Gee, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day."

 

"They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

 

"Oh, Hi, I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands."

 

"This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."

 

"I was just meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"

 

"This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"

 

"It worked well for Reagan, didn't it?"

 

"Just pacing myself for the all-nighter tonight!"

 

"I was working smarter-not harder."

 

"Auggh! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

 

"I'm in the management training program."

 

"Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot."

 

"Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"

 

"It's okay... I'm still billing the client."

 

And the #1 response if found asleep at your desk:
"...and I especially thank you for my excellent boss,
Amen!"       

A Story about Embarrassing Moments

Embarrassing Moments

 

The Board Meeting had come to an end.  Bob started to stand up and jostled the table, spilling his coffee over his notes.  "How embarrassing. I am
getting so clumsy in my old age."   Everyone had a good laugh, and soon we
were all telling stories of our most embarrassing moments. It came around to Frank who sat quietly listening to the others.
 
Someone said, "Come on, Frank. Tell us your most embarrassing moment."
    
Frank laughed and began to tell us of his childhood. "I grew up in San Pedro.  My Dad was a fisherman, and he loved the sea.  He had his own boat, but it was hard making a living on the sea.  He worked hard and would stay out until he caught enough to feed the family.  Not just enough for our family, but also for his Mom and Dad and the other kids that were still at home."

 

He looked at us and said, "I wish you could have met my Dad.  He was a big man, and he was strong from pulling the nets and fighting the seas for his catch.  When you got close to him, he smelled like the ocean. He would wear his old canvas, foul-weather coat and his bibbed overalls.  His rain hat would be pulled down over his brow. No matter how much my Mother washed them, they would still smell of the sea and of fish."

 

Frank's voice dropped a bit.  "When the weather was bad he would drive me to school.  He had this old truck that he used in his fishing business.
That truck was older than he was.  It would wheeze and rattle down the road.  You could hear it coming for blocks. As he would drive toward the school, I would shrink down into the seat hoping to disappear.  Half the time, he would slam to a stop and the old truck would belch a cloud of smoke.  He would pull right up in front, and it seemed like everybody would be standing around and watching. Then he would lean over and give me a big kiss on the cheek and tell me to be a good boy.  It was so embarrassing for me.  Here, I was twelve years old, and my Dad would lean over and  kiss me goodbye!"

 

He paused and then went on, "I remember the day I decided I was too old for a goodbye kiss.  When we got to the school and came to a stop,he had his usual big smile. He started to lean toward me, but I put my hand up and said, ''No,  Dad.''  It was the first time I had ever talked to him that way, and he had this surprised look on his face." I said, "Dad, I'm too old for a goodbye kiss.  I'm too old for any kind of kiss."

 

"My Dad looked at me for the longest time, and his eyes started to tear up.
I had never seen him cry. He turned and looked out the windshield."

 

"You're right," he said. "You are a big boy....a man.  I won't kiss you anymore."

 

Frank got a funny look on his face, and the tears began to well up in his eyes, as he spoke.  "It wasn't long after that when my Dad went to sea and never came back.  It was a day when most of the fleet stayed in, but not Dad.  He had a big family to feed. They found his boat adrift with its nets half in and half out.  He must have gotten into a gale and was trying to save the nets and the floats."
    
I looked at Frank and saw that tears were running down his cheeks. 

LIFE IS LIKE THE FALLING RAIN

Just like falling drops cannot be caught in a grip,

similarly Life cannot be confined to a grip.

The more you try to catch it the more it slips away.

Like the sand slips away, opportunities go by.

Everyone enjoys the Rain everyone wants to enjoy Life!

But can you wait for the same chance to come twice?

 

Rains go and come but does Life do the same??

NO!!! Opportunities, friends once lost can never be

repeated as seasons do. You can feel the Rain on

your face – hitting you across the face like needles

during a thunderstorm. No one complains about it

then why complain if Life does the same?

When one can enjoy Rains as such then why not

accept Life with its pains and gains. Rain comes

and goes, you can’t stop it then why try stopping Life?

 

 

Life is a pain, Life is a gain,
Life spent is not in vain.

 

Life is short, Life is sweet,
Life brings opportunities and moments sour.
Life is spent by minutes and hours.

 

Rain is seasonal, coming every year,
Life is just once, never again.

 

Life is a web of pains and gains,
Rain is simple and just plain.

 

Getting wet is enjoyment in Rain
But Life will always be a pain.

 

Life has its share of glory and fame,
Life has its own hall of fame.

 

So come, lets enjoy this Life and its gains,
Come my friends get wet in this Rain!!

 

  

 

  
 

Lessons On Life

Lessons on Life

 

There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge things too quickly.

So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.

 

The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.

 

When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen.

 

The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted. The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise.
The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen.
The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.

 

The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only one season in the tree's life.

 

He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons  are up.

 

If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the ! beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall.

Moral:

Don't let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest.
Don't  judge life by one difficult season.
Persevere through the difficult patches and better times are sure to come some time or later.

TRUST....

A little girl and her father were crossing a flimsy bridge. The father was
kind of scared so he asked his little daughter, "Sweetheart, please hold my
hand so that you don't fall into the river."

 

The little girl said, "No, Dad. You hold my hand."

 

"What's the difference?" asked the puzzled father.

 

"There's a big difference," replied the little girl. "If I hold your hand
and something happens to me, chances are that I may let your hand go. But if
you hold my hand, I know for sure that no matter what happens, you will
never let my hand go."

 

In any relationship, the essence of trust is not in its bind , age, caste or
creed but in its bond. So hold the hand of the person whom you love rather
than expecting them to hold urs..

Live a happier life

1. Throw out non-essential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctor worry about them. That is why you pay him/her.

 

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. If you really need a grouch, there are probably a few dozen of your relatives to do the job.

 

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Just never let the brain idle.

 

4. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.Laugh so much that you can be tracked in the store by your distinctive laughter.

 

5. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves.

 

6. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it is family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

 

7. Cherish your health. If it is good,preserve it. If it is unstable,improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

 

8. Don't take guilt trips. Go to the mall, the next county, a foreign country , but not guilt.

 

9. Tell the people you love, that you love them, at every opportunity . Remember, Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

 

10. Just be yourself and enjoy it.

This is happening in our life.

1. When in college !!
Hum honge kaamiyaab,
Hum honge kaamiyaab ek din.....
 
2. when giving interview to Multi National Company

 

Tu hi re.. Too hi ree.
tere binaaa main kaise jiyunn....
 
 
3. waiting for interview result!!
Intehaa ho gai Intzaarki..
aayinaaa kuch khabar mere yaarki...
 
 
4. just joined
Too cheez bhadi hai mast mast.....
 
 
5. after some time...
Ye kahaan aagaye hum??
 
 
6. After some more time...
Naa koyi umang hai, naa koyi tarang hai, meri jindagi kya ek kati
Pathang hai (booohoooo)
 
 
7. floating the resume
kabootar ja ja ja...
kabootar ja ja ja...
 
 
8. finally when you don't get a better offer any longer
Jeena yehaan, marna yehaan
Iske siwa jaana kahan... 

"Main Qaidi Number 786,

VEER-ZARA Film to dekhi hogi? Film ke end mein jab

VEER (Shahrukh Khan) buddha ho jata hai, to aik khoobsurat poem

mein apna haal sunata hai "Main Qaidi Number 786,

Jail ki salakhon se bahar deikhta hoon".

Akhir mein uski ZARA ke sath shadi ho jati hai aur film khatam hoti hai.

Leikin is ke baad VEER (Shahrukh Khan) kya kehta hai?

Wo Hazir khidmet hey......

 

 

Main Shohar Number 420
Khirki se bahar deikhta hoon
larkiyon se bhari college ki Bus,
jab unhain chor k jaati hai
aik larki jo paros mein rehti hai,
mere saamne aati hai
khud ko Samiya kehti hai
mujhe Uncle bulati hai
aisi pariyon ko deikh kar,
bahar jaane ko jee karta hai
khirki se neeche kood kar,
hath milane ko jee karta hai
Apni Biwi ko chor kar,
bhaag jaane ko jee karta hai
Wo kehte hain uska Bhai tandrust hai bohat
phir bhi maar khane ko jee karta hai
wo kehte hain ab kuch hath nahin aaye ga
phir bhi kuch paane ko jee karta hai.